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Crisis at 25

A few days back, my 25 year-old colleague came over to talk. She was feeling low, not because her work was not enjoyable, but because she was faced with a more serious question: she felt aimless in life. She wanted to know whether she is headed in any direction at all, and what will she get at the end of her rainbow. 

She is not alone in her predicament. There are many in the Gen X, Y or whatever category who are overwhelmed by the “uselessness” as they term it, of their job, career, situation and life. They do not know what to do, where to go, whom to ask for help. They are not sure if anybody can help at all in the first place. They may have hundreds of friends on Facebook, but they are not sure which of them is really a friend. They are not sure whom they should trust. They are not sure if the relationships they enjoy will last at all. 

This is a dizzy state to be in – the quarter life crisis as it is being termed - and is probably a result of the intensely competitive world we live in, where childhood ends at 7 years and late 20s is considered “old”. It’s a strange world we live in, isn’t it?

Is there an energy solution to my colleague’s situation? There definitely is because energy-wise, this state of mind comes when there is complete absence of a smooth energy flow. It is like the energy of Crawford Market. There is nothing wrong with its energy, but it takes some time and appetite to get used to it. If you are from a relatively peaceful part of town, try spending a day at Crawford Market or any other intensely crowded place and analyse how you feel. You would probably feel awful the first day, a little better the second day, and increasingly better as the days go by. The reason? Your energy will take its time to get used to another energy pattern. One cannot say how long this will take – it could take a minute or it could take years. That’s why you hear sentences like “Oh it’s years since I last went there, I just can’t handle it, you know”.
This holds true with all situations: a bride entering her sasural for the first time; the first day of a new employee; a student’s first day in school or college, etc. All these are situations when different energy patterns mix and it takes time for the synchronisation to happen.

So, what should my colleague do to deal with her situation? She and those who find themselves in a situation similar to hers can try the following:
  1. Accept your situation, thank yourself, and give yourself a big hug. You need to thank your body for serving you for so many years with aplomb. Think about it, how many times do we really thank ourselves?
  2. Analyse your basic energy flow: do you eat well and on time? Do you get 8 hours sleep given the fact most of today’s generation are nocturnal creatures? (Lack of sleep completely upsets your energy) Do you get Vitamin D that early morning sunrise provides? Do you drink 8 glasses of water everyday – after all, your body comprises 75 per cent water, and your brain 85 per cent.
  3. Check if you are a left-brained or a right-brained individual and see if the work you are doing is according to your personality
  4. Identify your passions – things that you have always wanted to in life but never got doing. Or it could be things that you did when you were younger and then left it due to lack of time. Get in touch with all these passions and be connected to them in a small way. Like music, or dance, or simply reading comics. Passions are energy providers.
  5. Write down all that’s clogged in your mind. Let the pen flow and do not analyse what and how you are writing. Your handwriting need not be neat and it’s okay if your grammar has gone for a toss. You need to remove the kachra from your mind first in order to think clearly. Decluttering not just of the mind, but also your house, is the easiest way to get your energy flowing.
When energy starts to flow, everything will just settle down. You will get clarity, opportunities will come and suddenly, the world, which looked like a big hellhole, will start to look very interesting.

8 comments:

Inaie said...

Thank you. It helped me too.

:-)

Jyotsna said...

what about mid-life crisis? :) after having spent years doing whatever was priority at that time-be it coping with challenges,raising children--sometimes one simply loses ones identity in that process dont they?
the process of life has been so fluid for me that am now trying to rediscover the earlier 'jo'..
nice read sri..aptly timed for me

pratibha said...

Interesting Post, Shridhar! I'd like to add one more thing to this - quarter life crisis also happens when there are no challenges or hurdles in life. Today's "some aplhabet generation - x or whatever" have always been given things on a platter - fantastic clothes, great food, fancy education, great homes, cars etc etc... and their parents continue to provide for them even after they get into their 20's... all this gives them very little to will to go and earn the same... you will rarely find a 20 something year old from a rural / semi-urban setting complaining under the same curcumstances, because they need to earn their keep! :) hence, some merit in Bill gates idea of keeping just about 10 Mil per kid and donating the rest to charity! :)

Cuckoo said...

I totally agree with the crisis at 25. I had read it earlier somewhere that if I write down my dreams and read it everyday then I am more likely to accomplish it. I did that when I was 25. I am almost 30 now, five years passed since then, alas! it didn't come true.

I have realised that my dream will come true, if not now, it will take two more years to a reality. And I will have all the patience and zeal required for it. But my main problem is I don't know what I am good at. A few days earlier there was strength finding workshop at our office. And I was one amongst the few chosen participant. During the session, every participant one by one told their strengths. When my turn came, I was absolutely stumped. I didn't know what my strengths are. My colleagues then decided to fill in and they said that I am good at networking (which i strongly disagree. I am more of a day dreamer), I am good at communications (god only knows) and thirdly I have a sportive nature (trust me, I am far from being sportive). I really don't know what gave them such notions about me. Does that mean, I dumb. I refuse to take my own fallacious conclusion because I do solve a lot of day to day problems.

Could you be of any help to me in finding my strengths. I will be really glad and obliged too.

Regards,
Tania

Cuckoo said...

I totally agree with the crisis at 25. I had read it earlier somewhere that if I write down my dreams and read it everyday then I am more likely to accomplish it. I did that when I was 25. I am almost 30 now, five years passed since then, alas! it didn't come true.

I have realised that my dream will come true, if not now, it will take two more years to a reality. And I will have all the patience and zeal required for it. But my main problem is I don't know what I am good at. A few days earlier there was strength finding workshop at our office. And I was one amongst the few chosen participant. During the session, every participant one by one told their strengths. When my turn came, I was absolutely stumped. I didn't know what my strengths are. My colleagues then decided to fill in and they said that I am good at networking (which i strongly disagree. I am more of a day dreamer), I am good at communications (god only knows) and thirdly I have a sportive nature (trust me, I am far from being sportive). I really don't know what gave them such notions about me. Does that mean, I dumb. I refuse to take my own fallacious conclusion because I do solve a lot of day to day problems.

Could you be of any help to me in finding my strengths. I will be really glad and obliged too.

Regards,
Tania

Hiren said...

Good article. The modern world is indeed producing some unique energy patterns and one gets to hear more and more people sick at a young age.

Among the things you mentioned, I liked the thing about passion the most. Just as body and brain is 75% and 85% water, life is 75% work and if that itself does not enthuse you, it is big crisis by itself the effects of which can spread to other arears-health, relationships, community etc. Everybody maynot be able to make his passion his profession but to the extent possible, I have tried to present in my blog-Make your passion your profession

All this and what you write in your posts should be a part of formal education.

ujwala said...

Interesting Post,Shridhar! I actually did what you suggested. It is nice to see the same solution on your blog.

Anonymous said...

what to do when your own mother suddenly betrays you, and your sister betrays you too?
and leave you orphaned all of a sudden.
and for no fault of mine.
my mother had an illegitimate child - my sister (unfortunately you know her!!)
and my sister came to know about it and blackmailed mother to throw me out of the house and put the house in her name and leave me homeless with my children.
how do you handle this type of situation.
or should my mother and sister be counselled??
thank you.