People who subscribe to this thought, will always be found doing the donkey’s work, denying themselves pleasure and comfort even if it is their right, and offered to them on a platter. They will always be the ones carrying other people’s burden – slowly burning themselves out from inside. Helping out is one thing, but becoming the martyr unnecessarily is quite another. Such people are programmed to hold on to their suffering.
No matter what you believe with your conscious mind, your subconscious will always win out over the long run and control your behaviour. And this behaviour will depend on how you have programmed yourself. Remember, your subconscious is like a super-computer. It only accepts and implements programs. Your conscious mind works while you’re awake, but your subconscious works round the clock.
People who think they have to be perfect, can never be wrong, will be rewarded for their suffering and self denial; will end up holding on to their suffering. Those who fear change or don’t feel competent to face the consequences of change, will be mired in martyrdom.
Society places a high premium on those who play the martyr – martyrdom while fighting for freedom, the Nirupa Royish-woman of the house sacrificing her wants at the altar of family service, the eldest in the family sacrificing his/her wishes to raise up his/her siblings in the absence of the parents – we see it all over the place. Is there anything wrong with it? While to be a martyr or not is an individual decision, from an energy perspective, it is certainly not a wise thing to do.
In energy terms, martyrdom is the voluntary giving of a chunk of your personal energy. Sustained giving later results in your subconscious automatically giving away energy all the time because it is programmed to do so. Such a person becomes the fall guy – like Dinesh Kartik is to the current Indian cricket team, playing the role of substitute, water-bearer, etc., despite being a good cricketer.
Martrydom drains your energy to a point when you have little or no energy left. There comes a point when the martyr has no energy left to give, and expects energy from others, without realising that it is the latter’s choice whether to give off their energy or not. It is at this time that we get to hear statements like – “I have done so much for him, sacrificed my wishes to fulfil his, but look how has betrayed me”. The onus of generating energy and conserving it is yours. You need to take care of yourself so that you can also take care of others.